Tuesday 12 January 2010

Incompetent farking quacks

I was feeling a bit off my game last week, so I went to see a local quack. After waiting for 2 hours, I got my 5 minutes with him. I told him what was wrong, and he recommended doing some blood tests. He printed out a form and told me to come back one morning to see the nurse to get some blood drawn. He also told me not to eat for 12 hours before the test.

I showed up the next day, first thing in the morning, and after waiting for half an hour, I got to see the nurse. She started by asking me where my urine sample was.

My what?

Not only had the quack forgotten to tell me that I needed to piss in a cup as soon as I woke up, but he also forgot to give me a cup to piss in, and stuffed the times up by telling me not to eat for 12 hours before the test. The nurse told me to eat nothing after midnight, and to come back the following day.

I now have a small hole in one arm, and I managed to shoot straight this morning. I'll know in two days whether it was just a momentary blip in my otherwise normally healthy existence, or if I am showing signs of wear and decline.

No comments: