Sunday 31 January 2010

Happy, shiny wheels

Took a tip today from my neighbour, who is much thinner and faster than me on two wheels, and hung the bike from the hills hoist in order to give it a de-grease and scrub.

Boy, do I wish I found out about that trick 5 years ago. A burdensome, filthy, back-aching chore was actually not too bad. Monkey even gave me a hand, which consisted of him scrubbing the same section of wheel about 50 times. I have this feeling I am going to apply the brakes in the morning and find that..... I have no braking power because there is still soap all over the rim.

I now have a clean, shiny bicycle - almost like a newbie. Except for the chips and scratches in the paint work, and the creaks and groans that it gives out every time a hill is hammered (the bike creaks and groans - I puff and pant).

I figured out today that there are several more indicators of newbie status. The first is the lack of a weather beaten look. If a cyclist has smooth, soft skin that is any colour but dark brown, then they are a newbie. I have the look of someone that has squinted into the rain/sun/hail/wind/bug swarm once too often.

Another sign is the legs. I mentioned calf muscles the other day - when a good cyclist is moving, their calf muscles start to look like a sock full of snakes having an orgy. But the thighs are also worth looking at. Size is not necessarily the issue - look instead for funny looking muscles poking out of odd places. You'll know it when you see it. A newbie will have the soft, round thighs of an office worker. An old hand has thighs that are as angular and chunky as... I don't know - maybe think Jesse Ventura in Predator.

The forecast says it is going to rain all week. Why on earth did I wash my bike today?

2 comments:

kae said...

Hi dude

It's been raining all day here, off and on. And is raining again now, quite heavily. It's welcome, it's not rained for some time (since Christmas when it rained after Christmas for about a week, just showers most days).

Anyway, I haven't caught up with the grass cutting since I got the repaired mower back. It goes like a rocket now so I think it will be easy to mow now.

I'd had almost 2 inches on Friday from three storms on Thursday afternoon, Thursday night and Friday afternoon. And the temps has cooled quite a bit, too, which has been welcome.

Bed time now.

Your "Why did I wash the bike?" plea just made me LOL.

Have a good week.

Steve D said...

My preferred indicator of bike newness is the shine of the spokes. No matter how clean the bike is, the spokes always seem to get dull with age...