The mystery of the shopping trolleys revealed...

We might now have some idea of who is dumping shopping trolleys in our street, and it's not the neighbours.

Our Deputy Mayor gave us the answer yesterday - it's shoppers who park in our street, go shopping, and can't be bothered to take the trolley back.

Now I was initially gobsmacked and dumbfounded at that idea, and thought it lunacy, as the local shopping centre has two underground levels of parking and you can always get a spot down there. But I had not counted on the wierd phobias and habits that some people have. As he told us, some people will not drive down the ramp to the car park as it is "too steep".

Now I have driven into a lot of shopping centre and office car parks in my time, and I don't think our local car park ramp is overly steep. It's not the going down that freaks people out apparantly - it's the coming out again. The nutters seem to think that they need to build up a great head of speed to get up the ramp, and they'll never be able to stop at the top at the pedestrian crossing, and they'll run old grannies and prams over because they won't be able to stop at the exit.

Crikey, what are they driving? Steam engines or bloody Subaru's? Yes, steam trains facing a long gradient need a good run up to get all the way to the top without stalling, but no modern car faces that problem. Even my old Hillman Hunter would not have had a problem with the slope in question - even with 9 people in the boot. Well, ok, realistically, it only would have made it up the hill with 6 people in the boot (and thin people at that).

So what this means is that our suburb is full of demented people who can't control their cars properly.

And these demented people with the car driving skills of drunken kenyan truck drivers are parking outside our house.

Hmmm, not good. Next time one parks in front of our place and goes shopping, I'll have to use the Disco to push their car a few houses down the street. They can then pull their stupid car driving antics in front of someone else's place.

But this does give me an excuse to look for some sort of security web cam on ebay to stick outside the front door.