Hello?! Anyone there?

Last Friday night, I sent a fax to our MPs office asking that she goes around to tell Plod to clean up their front yard.

So far, no response.

Hmm, not looking good.

I spent half a year writing "cockroach letters", and our golden rule was that you either replied to the complainant the same day, or you punched out an acknowledgement letter and sent it out same day. Something along the lines of, "Dear Loonie, thank you for your pile of dribble. When we stop laughing, we'll think about replying, then tracking you by satellite and having you committed to a secret CIA prison in Kazakhstan".

Yours truly,
etc etc

Assuming that some slack and lazy toads opened the office on Monday and bothered to check the fax before leaving, they should have been able to send a reply by now. Bugger it, they could have walked around and stuck a reply under our front door. If I went out into the street with a nine iron and a golf ball, I could hit the ball over the Plod station and hit our MPs office, which is in the next street. I wonder why I bothered faxing it. It would have been less effort to walk it around and stuff it under her door.

My letter has obviously had no impact yet, as Plod's front yard is still covered in crap.

I should be careful though. As I rode past the station this morning, Plod pulled out behind me and followed me down to the lights. If they had known that their nemesis was right in front of them on a pushbike, they probably would have nudged my off the road into the back of a bus and called it a "high speed pursuit" accident.