Nobody quite shits me like Greens. There I was, riding to work and minding my own business, when I pedaled onto the narrow bike bridge over Victoria Road - and there were two fucking mungbeans standing in the middle of the bridge, blocking my passage. Talk about a morning for stupid hats and moronic places to stand whilst taking photos of each other. Yeah, that was really sticking it to the man.
The flatulent pair were up there because they had unfurled a banner.... a banner on climate change. And who were they directing their message to? Was it the cyclists riding into town, travelling on their non-polluting steeds? Was it the pedestrians, walking into work and exhaling nothing but a few grammes of CO2 from their lungs?
No, they were talking to the motorists driving down below. The motorists who really couldn't be bothered getting out of their cars, and who probably don't give a small, pustulent crap about climate change. If they did, they'd be sitting on a bus, or cycling in with me.
The clanger is this...... I looked around the base of the bridge, and there weren't two bikes chained up there. The only way the Greens could have transported their banner (on climate change) to this location, where they interfered with non-polluting forms of transport - was to drive.
The irony just kills me.
This is why I just cannot stand them. I'd really love to spend the weekend shooting harpoons into whales just off Sydney - no, preferably in the harbour itself, so that many could see my actions - just to annoy them.